Family v. Sanity

Can one legitimately include family and sanity in the same sentence?

After the last four days, I find myself unable to form a logical sentence that includes the two words. Yes, for those who can not catch on – I am losing my mind in OK. I think the part most difficult is that I am constantly with my mother; we came in her car so I am at the mercy of her schedule. I know what most of you are thinking – you are so similar that you are driving each other crazy…NEGATIVE. We are different ends of the pole, She is messy, a pack rat, SLOW (talking, walking, thinking, games, etc.), and has a completely dry sense of humor focused mainly on puns…I am none of those things. My brother (whose house we have been staying at) took after my mother on the first two items; I am about to lose my mind in this clutter environment. You know it is bad when you have to arrive early enough to clean the toilet, shower, bed, and kitchen before you stay.

So we arrive on Saturday and my mom wants to go this old dive for a malt and what not. Let me just tell you about this place. It is the kind of a drive in/walk up. You park your car in what appears to be a drive in (car port and the sort) but then you have to walk into the main area to place your order and then go back to your car and wait until they call your number. Although I hate fast food, I suck it up and humor her. After reading the menu 8 times hoping to find something that contains vegetables or something that will not stay in my system for the remainder of the holidays (nothing there), I finally decide on a roast beef sandwich…you guessed it they are out, I ask for chicken, out of that as well. But I am told in a hick voice, the BBQ is nice or we have burgers. Welcome to Oklahoma – burgers or BBQ. Of course, I guess I should be thankful it wasn’t catfish season. In all honestly, there actually are good places to eat in this town. I found a really good sushi place today and my favorite restaurant in the world is the Greek House.

So everyone in this town drinks Chocolate Milk from Braums. This stuff is so thick it could be substituted for oil in car. Don’t get me wrong it is good but a 1-10 dilution is almost necessary to maintain good health. We take my grandma by to get some yesterday. When we arrived the main door has a huge sign that reads “Be careful, the door is broken” and then when you try and check out the credit card machine only accepts the food stamps cards (the credit card and debit system is broken on it.) No joke!!! I scrounged around for some cash, which I never carry and was able to make it out of there without having the door fall over on me & without finding a family to buy food stamps off of.

It is about time for me to head back down to my grandmas (for the third day in the row) to visit with another set of cousins and an aunt and to see about 10 people I have already spent 2 straight days with so I better wrap this up. I love them BUT tomorrow can not come soon enough ~ I am so ready to see some serious concrete & get back to a "normal" routine!

Lone Leaf

Today, at the fitness park, I noticed a tree that had lost all of its leaves save one. This poor dried up leaf was flapping in the wind (as much wind as you get on a Dec day in Houston, TX) and literally hanging on by a thread. I then begin to wonder why it, above all the others, has been able to withstand the forces of nature. But if you stop and think about it…there has to be a last leaf to fall just like there was most certainly a first. Part of me wanted to just pluck the poor thing off and save it from the misery, another part of me wanted to be artsy and take a photo of the “life” it still contained and the symbolism to reality. However, I must confess, the part of me that won said just to keep walking with the intent to revisit it soon to see if it was able to withstand despite the odds against it.

I guess sometimes in life we feel like that lone leaf ~ for example, when all of friends have moved on to another stage in life and we are left unchanged. Does it mean we are meant to fall into their footsteps with the next stage as well or take our time and fall when nature calls? People constantly ask me when I will marry. Why? Can’t they see that I am content to be that lone leaf hanging on? Am I scared to fall? Maybe. Am I intimidated of life on the other side? Not so much! Have I met any ground more worthy than the tree I am still attached to? Most certainly not!
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I doubt anyone else today will get that much out of the tree in the middle of the fitness park! Happy Holidays! J=

The BIG 13th!

Yesterday one of my boy cousins turned 13! As the middle child of two brothers who are 18 months older and 18 months younger he is full of personality and always has been; I honestly doubt he has ever met a stranger. It is funny b/c all three boys have such distinctive personalities. On their birthdays if you ask if you can sing, he replies “OF COURSE”, the oldest will say, “Nah” and the youngest begrudgingly says “Whatever!” I guess it goes to show that a lot of our personality is nature not nurture. He also has a wonderful memory (must run in the family) as last night I asked him if he remembered his dinosaur cake from years ago (I think it was his 4th birthday) and not only did he say “yes” but proceeded to tell me the colors that were included on the cake. AMAZING!!!!! How can a child experience something less than 1500 days out of the womb and then recall it for so many more days to come; the mind is such a remarkable thing! My birthday wish for him as he enters his teenage years is that he continues to develop the wonderful personality he was gifted with. He has been through so much over the years. At about the age of about 3 his mother was diagnosed with Breast Cancer and went through surgeries, chemo, and what not and 2 years later, at the age of 5, his father passed away while jogging at the young age of 39. However, through it all, he has remained one of the happiest & most well adjusted children I know. Birthday wishes for an amazing teenage boy!

Assembling my Threads

Maybe it is my 30th approaching with rapid speed or the sudden serious illness of a childhood friend but lately I have been evaluating my existence. I guess we all do it at different stages of our lives and during diverse events. I recently told a friend who was experiencing a difficult time in his life that sometimes you have to understand the relationship with yourself (your values, hopes, beliefs, and desires) before you can effectively be worthwhile in a relationship with another. I explained it like this…the clothes you wear on a daily basis are symbolic of you who are, what you stand for, and where you are going while your relationships with others are your accessories to the wardrobe (hats, belts, earrings.) You can not survive on relationships with others to validate your existence. If you try that route it is equivalent leaving the house on a cold winter day with only your watch on! …I am in the process of ‘Assembling my Threads.’